The one thing that I have learned is that nothing is truly permanent. There was asian metaphor about time, “As birds fly past this mountain, one in every generation will brush this mountain with its wing. In time, those wings will wear down that mountain to a mere hill.”

When I don’t get accepted to a show, I just move on to the next thing and look for something else to do. It is the way of things and you really can’t sweat it. Ultimately, the denials do tend to wear on anyone and having my friends say things like, “I can’t believe they wouldn’t accept you!” or “That doesn’t make any sense, you are so good”, really helps to bolster the bruised ego. That isn’t the only reason to have them around but, I will say it is a perk.

Being the youngster I was, stuff derailed a lot. I’ve blown car engines, had fires next door and in my house, animals injured, people injured; the main thing is to keep calm and look for options. You can’t always rely on people answering their phones and sometimes, most times; you are best if you can rescue yourself.

A few days ago, I came across a couple videos about historical and inexpensive ways to do things for a fraction of the cost. I love the idea of finding old ways of doing things and sharing the information.

When you get farther down the line and become a professional, having real knowledge can help you with sales and relationships with galleries. I remember being on one forum about framing pastels and learning “plein air” or “french” mount, where the glass is placed on the surface of the art. Framers worry about the way glass flexes with heat and cold, gallery owners worry about mold. I was able to assure the gallery owner that one of the forum members had “french” mounted a piece and put it in a barn to see what would happen to it after a few years. Nothing happened to it, but the piece was sealed on 4 sides with art tape and between the piece of glass and acid free foam core.

The narrative is important information because it helps people understand that I came to this later in life. I always felt that I had sacrificed those early years supporting my mother’s career but recently I have been looking at my mentors. It isn’t just about what they have accomplished, or where they are in their careers but also where they are standing in their life journey.

My art practice is mine, and my lifestyle is the choice I make for it. For those of you who know, you know; you wake up every day making that choice. When you go somewhere, you are taking that choice with you. Those who don’t, expect that when you leave town; you are on vacation. Artists who are professionals are never on vacation, and we never regret it. We understand and accept this is a choice.

When my students are in my class and say that inevitable phrase, “I know this is a dumb question…” I always tell them that there is no “dumb” question, only unasked ones. Artists and scientists tend to explore areas that others don’t because we stop worrying about what others think and just go ahead and ask the why. If we can’t get answers that satisfy us, we hunt and gather information; everywhere.

I think that the statement about old dogs is misleading and limiting because as I have aged, the youthful passion isn’t as influential anymore. The heat of rage can come on still, I know because I recently felt it; but it no longer holds sway over my decision-making process. Frustration no longer backs me into a corner and clouds the possible exits. I can stop and think about solutions, figure out ways to problem solve.

An artist has to have faith in themselves and their ability to do something. Some call it arrogance, others refer to it as pride; to me it is trust. Trust in hard work and education from mentors, study and effort.

We can only push for so long before we need to step back for a little bit and recharge. Sure, if a person wants to they can go to college day after day until they have their degree but there is a reason we take a spring break or a summer break. Teachers need time off and so do you; so they shut down the campus.

Each of us ends up facing set backs or tragedy, and when we do, we tend to rate things by comparison. How bad is what I am facing compared to others? The thing is, what you can overcome; others might see as simple and still others might consider insurmountable. The reality comes down to this; how bad do you want something? When you look to the examples of others ask yourself, “How badly did they want their goals?”

do it enough it comes naturally and you don’t need to worry about failing in the clutch. That’s right, you can stop worrying about making a fool of yourself and just concentrate on doing what you know how to do and get lost in the process even under stressful situations.

Students will sometimes ask me about the art that I create, do I like everything I do? It isn’t a question that comes up often because they are afraid of the answer. Truth; Nobody likes everything they do. If they say it, they are lying to themselves and you. I actually need to have a symbolic burn one of these days of the work that is crap. Most of the time I just throw it away when I hate it. The point is this; Maybe you are an artist when your creativity has become an accidental habit.

That is why I paint what I do, because I have come to love the moment. The moment you are in is perfection, right now (well perhaps not every moment). When that moment is perfection; you need to mark it for your heart, your spirit, your soul. That moment might just be the thing that heals something that is hurt or even broken.

My husband keeps having to remind me that we need to keep moving forward and I can’t just stop because of what is going on.  I took a time out last year and I was sorry I did.  I shouldn’t have, I should have kept pushing and gone more places. 

I was speaking with an artist today about how solitary our profession can be and that being social can be an effort. Interacting with people, being a part of the human experience; can recharge our creative batteries. It is something that all people need but as artists, we must not ignore it.

Questions lead us to bigger answers that send us in larger directions and unlock new horizons such as; outer space, fluid dynamics, defying gravity. All of those questions have sent us down rabbit holes where we have redefined our existence and the limits of our world.

The key to being an artist is that you continue to create.  It isn’t about selling something, even your art.  Being an artist isn’t about justifying the artistic identity; it is more about the continuous act of making something; all the time. 

I generally have a loose plan before the ball drops on the new year. I have an idea of what shows I want to do, ones I want to try and ones that I have decided to leave alone by the time September rolls around. I knew that I was going to be setting myself up for the residency in Albany NY this coming fall already and I have a class planned in St George UT this March. I have to, I need to figure out how to pay for them before I get close to them.